Wolves in Sheep’s Clothing: The Facts of Manipulation

If it looks like a wolf and sounds like a wolf and smells like a wolf then….. it probably is a wolf. Such is the essential message of the revealing book ‘In Sheep’s Clothing – Understanding and Dealing with Manipulative People’ by George Simon. Dr. Simon rejects the modern-day notion that behind covert-aggressive behaviour lies a wounded and insecure individual and proposes instead that behind covert-aggressive behaviour lies….well…..quite simply….a covert-aggressive person! Someone who, in his words, is always ‘fighting for what they want and seeking power over others in subtle, cunning and under-hand ways’. A wolf in sheep’s clothing. Continue reading

Hey you, stop jumping the queue!

What is it about queues that brings out the best and the worst in human nature? We’ve all been there. You’re hot and sweaty in an over-crowded airport terminal edging forward in a human snake that stretches into the distance. Glancing at your watch, and sensing your blood pressure rising, you watch as up-front an elderly couple sneak into the queue from the side and claim an illegitimate advantage. ‘I bet they’re Italians’? mutters someone just ahead and there is a grumble of agreement from all around as public shame and humiliation are heaped upon the unsuspecting brigands. Continue reading

Feedforward vs Feedback, Marshall Goldsmith

At a recent conference one of the delegates said, “we should feedforward rather than give feedback”. This struck a chord with me as I frequently talk about feedback, the ‘F’ of FACTS, but have not talked about feedforward.

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The pressure in the system – abusive supervisors

In research summarised in the July edition of the Psychologist journal, Pedro Neves at the New University of Lisbon found that following organisational downsizing employees are more likely to receive abuse from their supervisors. Maybe this is more common than we think.

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Who wants to be the Accountability Killjoy?

‘Sooner or later we all sit down to a banquet of consequences’. I was reminded of this quote from Robert Louis Stevenson when Ian and I delivered our challenging coaching session at the World Business & Executive Coaching Summit (WBECS) last Friday. We’d challenged ourselves to freshen up our material and bring in some new perspectives on the various elements of the FACTS coaching model. In preparing for the session I came across the Stevenson quote whilst re-visiting the ‘A’ of FACTS; accountability. Continue reading

WBECS and the Cosy Club

What would you say to a senior executive you were coaching who had not undertaken any of the actions agreed at the previous meeting? This was the question John and I asked participants at the Challenging Coaching session of the WBECS virtual conference.

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